It’s always interesting to me, the idea that surfers of adult sites seem to have - that this entire industry that produces all the pornography that they’re enjoying either doesn’t make any money, or SHOULDN’T make any money. I can understand the first perspective, sort of, because we all have a tendency to limit our worldviews and perceptions to what we personally take part in, so if you only get your porn off the tube sites and /rs/ or something, you might assume that’s how everyone does it. The second opinion is what I am more confused by: there are a lot of people involved in bringing you the photos & videos you jerk off to. Obviously, the pornstars, the directors, the people who recruit the ‘actors’, site designers, video editors, etc etc etc… believe it or not, this industry is a real job for a lot of people. Why is there this idea out there that they shouldn’t make money simply because it’s porn?
If you’re wondering what inspired this entry, one of my Ann Angel posts got linked to by some editorial (read it here) that was basically a bunch of hypocritical bitching about how this site dares to make money off of niche porn. Ignoring the fact that this was coming from a website that seems no stranger to internet moneymaking itself (multiple advertisements on every page), what the writer seemed to completely ignore was that this isn’t some sort of automated blog. Gamer Fetish came about because I happen to work in the adult industry, and my boyfriend and I both waste almost all of our free time away via video games, and one day I had the idea to mix the two together. I mean, if we like seeing pretty girls play video games or do other nerd-related things, why wouldn’t the rest of the world? So the idea came from not only a business-minded place (I do like to at least PRETEND to myself that I have some decent business/marketing ideas sometimes), but also the fact that it just seemed like it would be fun, and that people who LIKE this kind of pornography might appreciate having a collection of it that gets frequently (okay… sometimes) updated.
So, considering the fact that I take the time to find all of these galleries (and yeah, sometimes I have to dig deep, a few of these galleries come - with permission, I’m kind of a goody-goody like that - from member’s areas or were exclusive to my site when I posted them… and those wouldn’t have come about if I wasn’t an affiliate/putting up links to the site they came from), maintain the website, write blog entries, pay hosting bills, and so on and so forth… is it really so offensive that I get an occasional kickback if someone decides they like a paysite that I exposed them to enough to join it? I mean, maybe if the condescension that I’m reacting to came from someone who blogged on a completely non-profit website, I’d say they had a point (or at least were in a place to make such remarks), but coming from where it came from… no. It’s just someone whining about the fact that I might make money off of my site so that they, in turn, can make money off of their site with THEIR advertisements. Funny, that.
Oh, and I can’t speak for all the girls featured here, but Kate, Anna, and the Geek Girls all really DO play video games and nerd out like it’s their job. I think Ann Angel also falls into this category, but I can’t guarantee it as I’ve never spoken to her personally.
On a more personal level, I know that I’ve mentioned a few times in this blog that I have been having increasing problems with my memory and ability to focus long enough to do, well, anything - even fall asleep, if that makes sense. I was put on Adderall a little over a year ago, and when I take it, it helps tremendously: it’s akin to that fuzzy, out-of-range channel at the top of the dial suddenly becoming clear and coherent.
Unfortunately, I have two reservations about my Adderall prescription, both of which I have mentioned before: the fact that I hate the idea of being reliant on amphetamines to be able to think properly, and the fact that it costs upwards of $100 per month to fill my prescription - even when getting generics. This train of thought led me to getting a sort of “trial” prescription for Wellbutrin, which supposedly can help with Adult ADD.
Worst idea of my life. I don’t think that I have ever reacted so violently to any pill; even the time that I tried Lexapro to stabilize my blood pressure and instead just developed an omnipresent pain-to-the-touch in my skin. No, this was much worse. Within about a week and a half, I was not only thrust into crushing depression (I remember my mother carting me around to therapists when I was younger, convinced that I was depressed; I didn’t think I was then, now I know that I wasn’t, because what I have been feeling in the past few weeks was just hopeless and awful and strangling and… completely something that I had never before experienced), but I couldn’t move without excruciating pain shooting through every part of my body. I quickly figured out that somehow my body was so incredibly sensitive to the drug that even being - and I am not exaggerating - 10-15 minutes off of 24 hours between pills would, in essence, leave me crippled: I could only sit in a strange, L-like hunch (as a quick side note, to cure my boredom while my sites were being moved, I took a strange Death Note/Jung combination personality test that labeled me as sharing the INTP personality type with none other than L; although that varies slightly from the other test I took recently that categorized me as INTJ, which this test associated with Near. Since Near - in my opinion - comes off as an arrogant, insufferable jerk, I’m going to just decide to go with INTP instead, ha) with one side of my abdomen constantly curved. And other movement - or taking too deep of a breath - would make me want to scream, it hurt so fucking bad.
Within about three days of this, I made the obvious decision to begin weaning myself off of the Wellbutrin. This ended up taking so much longer than it should have - like, three times longer than I’d even been taking the pills in the first place; sure, I was cutting the pills smaller and smaller each day, then every other day, but still: even a slight difference in the timing of my pill consumption and I would be a physical wreck.
I am on my fourth day without ingesting any of that stupid, stupid pill and while the physical pain is gone, I am still feeling a bit listless and depressed, though much less so than I had been.
What a fucking nightmare.
In other words:
Adderall, I will never, ever cheat on you again =(
It seems like all I write about anymore is how I don’t have the motivation to write.
I make for some seriously boring blogging right now. Sorry about your RSS feeds, y’all.
Somebody needs to come give me a kick in the face, or something.
A friend of mine posted about my situation with Cash Uncovered on a webmaster message board that I don’t usually frequent. I didn’t ask him to make the post, he made it because he thought that it would expedite the process of getting the missing check situation resolved. Apparently, Steve overestimated the maturity levels of the guys at CU, and the thread turned into some wannabe drama-bomb clusterfuck.
I’ll just summarize the retarded ass shit that the CU guys pulled in that thread (and here, even, one of them decicded to showcase his absolutely ASTOUNDING reading comprehension by leaving a comment here that I’d already said was irrelevant to the missing checks). Now, I’ll be honest - I haven’t bothered to check the thread again after my last post in it over a day ago, because the responses they’ve given already made it pretty clear that they’re more interested in trolling/internet tough guy-ing than actually reading & processing what I responded with, so there’s no point in even putting forth effort towards that forum.
For the most part, I’ve had a pretty good experience in the online adult industry so far, especially when it comes to affiliate programs - they’re usually helpful, pay me on time and accurately, some even go the extra mile and help me get specific content for a themed website or give me promotional passwords (I’ve got to give Kate from Prissy Pays some props right now, she recently sent me some gamer-themed content from the Natalie Sparks member’s area for me to put up on Gamer Fetish).
Unfortunately, the time has come for me to face facts - I seem to have found a dud. It’s even more disappointing because Cash Uncovered converted really well, even on the small amount of traffic I sent their way. All time, I’m 1:216 with them, with 7 signups. That’s pretty awesome. Unfortunately, it’s not so awesome when I’ve had to drop their links because they’ve never bothered to pay me.
I even contacted them a few months ago, asking what was up and why I’d never seen a dime from them, saying that I’d hate to have to stop promoting them because they have great content, great sites, and a great ratio. At first, I got some replies from them - stating that they had “records” of sending me the checks, and when I suggested that perhaps they had gotten lost or there was a mix-up (because truly, I’ve never gotten anything from them), they offered to check with their bank to see if the supposedly mailed checks (sorry, I’m a bit suspicious they ever existed now) had ever been cashed. So I thanked them, and then waited… waited…
I’m still waiting, MONTHS later. I’ve shot them a few more e-mails, trying to touch base, but no response. And of course, no checks from them have arrived, even though I had made more sales with them in between that conversation and the time I finally decided it was time to pull their links from my websites. I’ve sent them one last e-mail today, and I think that if I don’t hear anything from them within a week, I’ll have to take it to the webmaster boards and do the whole drama thread/internet hissy fit thing, which I really don’t want to do… I am a very (probably too much so) non-confrontational person with this sort of thing, but after my last “real” job deciding to never pay me my promised raise that went with my promotion even though I had still been doing the extra work, I’ve come to realize that people WILL take advantage of that fact and bank on my distaste for drama overcoming my rights/things that I’ve earned or been promised.
So cross your fingers this gets worked out and I get paid. Ugh.
I’m slightly annoyed by the fact that some ad sponsors and blog directories have been categorizing this website as “XXX”; it makes me wonder if they’ve really even bothered to actually read anything that I’ve posted. I noticed that even on StumbleUpon, I’m classed as pornography. That’s an interesting feat to accomplish when the only photo/video hosted on this entire website is the vector graphic of a fully-clothed woman in the header. I’m left to assume that either even just mentioning the “P” word gets you classed as an adult website/objectionable content, because really… most of what I discuss here (especially lately) has been mainstream affiliate programs, sales, etc. I do link to OTHER websites that have adult content, but I wasn’t really aware that linking to a website meant you were in the same category. Maybe I’m just applying too much logic here and not enough knee-jerk reaction on the basis of the domain name/my job.
All I know is, I wanted to have the ads served on this website to be actually RELEVANT to the content (ie hosting, affiliate programs, seo/traffic tips, etc), not the hardcore triple-x stuff that AdBrite starting pulling up when they decided this was a porn site. But from what I’ve been reading at Digital Point, I’m hardly alone in this phenomenon. One poster seems to have had their AdBrite account that was serving ads on a mainstream website switched to Black Label Ads solely due to one swear word in their comments section. I’m sorry, but that’s a little overzealous.
They’re not the only ones, though. Blog Catalog decline to list this website as well, I’m assuming due to classifying it as adult. Same goes for Net Audio Ads, though that’s not terribly upsetting as this website probably attracts more of an other-webmaster crowd than their target ad audience, anyway. It is slightly misleading, though, that when I read their terms prior to signing up, there was nothing in them excluding adult websites (or websites that talk about adult websites, for that matter).
I’ve asked for a few people’s opinions on how they would personally class this blog, and I’ve received mixed results. Some have said it’s obviously an adult blog, others have said it can’t be because there’s no photos, videos, or even erotic text on it! I’d like to hear more opinions, so leave me a comment and let me know where exactly you think I stand.
I had this great, thoughtful & in-depth post typed out last night, all about my insecurities and struggles in this business… but literally just as I hit submit, my hosting decided to shit out on me. I checked every single website of mine, and all the ones hosted with Webair had vanished. After waiting on someone to actually sign into their supposed “24/7 Live Support” for about 15 minutes, and putting in a support ticket with no response, I posted in their thread on a high-traffic webmaster forum noting that my sites were all inexplicably down and that I couldn’t get ahold of anyone to help me. Within three minutes of that post, my sites were magically back up.
I got an accompanying e-mail that simply stated:
“Hello.
We apologize for the difficulties.
We have corrected the problem and your websites are working now.
Thank you.”
Okay, but why the fuck did it happen in the first place? When I pay for hosting I expect my websites to stay up and accessible, especially when they’re my main source of income. I checked all my usage statistics, and I haven’t gone over with bandwidth or anything of the like - I’ve used about half my alloted BW for the month and the month is almost over. I kept up my end of the deal, I’d at least like some heads up if you’re doing maintenance and my sites are going to be down for awhile so I don’t waste my time trying to update them and then suddenly having all my work disappear into the void! I mean, I know hosting will have problems, but is it so hard to shoot a mass e-mail to the clients affected? It doesn’t help my mood that Posh Freebies disappeared for about an hour earlier in the week due to an unexplained problem with the sql server it’s on. I’m started to get really annoyed and somewhat concerned that I made a really bad choice in switching to Webair - I’ve only been with them for a month and I’m already having so many damn issues. They can’t even bill me properly - my invoice with them has been sitting on “pending” and has stated that they’d initiate billing in the next 24 hours… for the past two weeks. I have the money just sitting there waiting for them to actually do something about it, I’ve tried re-entering my payment info, tried contacting the Billing department… their only response was this:
“I have looked over your account and see that you have one invoice pending as of 12/10/07.”
Well, no shit. That’s exactly what I fucking contacted you about. The fact that the invoice has been pending for SEVENTEEN DAYS, and has yet to actually initiate any funds transfers as per the payment method I have set up.
I’m just so damn frusterated right now. Get this shit together, people. If you can’t even take my money properly, and my websites have disappeared TWICE in my first month hosting with you, how do you think this looks?